“Couples need to create traditions between them — special symbols that only the couple has. This promotes a sense of intimacy,” says Patricia Colina, Master of Social Work and marital therapist. “When couples have these special rituals that are symbolic just to them, it knits them closer together and can definitely be part of increasing the longevity of the relationship.”
Here are some suggestions for an at-home Valentine’s Day to remember, and for establishing some traditions of your own.
1. Start off the day with a sweet twist on breakfast in bed. Instead of traditional fare, why not put cake and ice cream on the menu? If cake baking is time-prohibitive, try a quick apple or blackberry cobbler (and enjoy the sweet, spicy scent wafting throughout the house).
2. To wrap up the day with romance, first get the kids occupied elsewhere. You could entice them with their own “movie night,” complete with a recent-release rental and hot, buttered popcorn. Turn the lights down for a real theatre atmosphere — but keep the kids within earshot!
3. With your “alone time,” why not cook a favourite meal together? Take the opportunity to re-create milestones in your relationship. Recall your first date. Was there a specific meal you ordered? Were there particular flowers present? Or, did you honeymoon in Puerto Vallarta? Use a serape for a tablecloth and decorate with silk hibiscus to set the stage and create a meal inspired by Mexico.
4. After dinner (and a quick check on the kids!), gather your photos for a trip down your own romantic memory lane. See which bring up fond — and funny! — memories of how your relationship has evolved.
5. End the evening with a stroll outside, and enjoy the still of a winter evening together.
However you choose to mark the day, it’s making the gesture in the first place that counts, says Colina. “Couples share not only the good things but the not-so-good things with each other,” she says. “To know that you can both share your flaws and still be accepted, and want to make each other happy — that gift is more important than what you actually do. It really is the thought that counts.”
